What to do?
Time to start planning… for the next one!
But the imprint of a character is not something you can remove as easily from you psyche as the costume from your back.
The character still lives in you. The emotions you have experienced don’t just dissipate, they linger. All emotions leave traces that last beyond the fleeting experience of them coursing through your mind and body when you are actually feeling them, and your body and mind do not distinguish between those that were your own and those that belonged to your character – they are one and the same.
Queenie’s temper and her impatience particularly, are still in the forefront of my mind, a tint on my world view that also lingers in my muscle memory. The way my hands move, the stance of my feet, the expression I hold on my face. It is another way of thinking that is not entirely mine but was made by me, formulated by me in my thoughts, made by me with my body, and each thought and physical expression is a part of me I cannot simply detach, or turn on and off like a switch.
As part of an actor’s training one must learn to create, but also learn to let go.